I recently read Seconds To Snap by Scottish author, Tina McGuff, and it elicited so many strong emotions with every word that I realised this was one of the best books to read to understand the shame, and guilt concerning eating disorders. Seconds To Snap takes you through the dark details of an eating disorder so often missed in popular culture, and is an important lesson in eating disorder awareness.
Walking up a flight of beige stairs, my heart beat in triple time with every step, I could feel nausea settling deep into my stomach. I can turn back now and just pretend like I never contacted them, I thought as I stepped closer and closer to the waiting room. I wanted so badly to turn around and go back to the library, hide behind my university work, and push down the anxiety and depression. But, before I knew it, I was knocking on the door of the receptionist, and announcing myself: "Hi, I'm Adrienne. I've got an appointment at 2pm." This is my experience of counselling at university.
"You know, I'm still standing, better than I ever did," were song lyrics sang in the 1983 Elton John hit I'm Still Standing. In my first blog post for There's Methods in Mental Health, I speak about dealing with the factor of self-hatred remaining in your life well after you have recovered.